Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
how does that bad decision feel?
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