ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Randomize
