if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize