Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize
