yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize