That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
