If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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