I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
