Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize