just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
