No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
