these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I'm getting married
To pizza
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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