Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
