She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
