I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
