Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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