The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Randomize
