My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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