Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Mom said you looked used
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
