I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
