I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Mom said you looked used
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
