Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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