she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
