is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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