After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
