i don't like sucking hair
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
