Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
