please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize