You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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