i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Randomize
