Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
