Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
