that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Boobs are out for the taking
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize