She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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