C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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