I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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