You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
