We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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