I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
