its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
