after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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