So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
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