none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
