I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
