i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize