The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
