the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Randomize
