I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
