Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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