i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
